Some stream-of-consciousness (esque) little notes I found in my phones memory today. I wrote these months ago, and while my opinion has changed slightly, I can still see the world through the depressed lens I wore for so long by reading this. I think there's some wisdom, if you look for it.
"A depressing fact of growing up, at least for me, is a decreasing desire to follow your childhood dreams. It's not that you don't still want to do those things; instead, you start seeing lies, greed and corruption in all the places that you held as purest/holiest. You don't want to be part of a machine that goes against your beliefs; ironically, the same ones that They claim to live by. In the beginning, you think that you can be that one that makes the difference; that one who turns the tables and puts the game on its head. But slowly you realize that's what everyone thought when they got in: "I'm going to change the world by following my pure dream. I'll remove the obstacles in the way." But you get worn down and jaded, and start to feel its not worth the lifetime effort. Who will appreciate you having paved the way, when everyone else wants to cling to the idea that they could've paved something else instead?"
bad boys: late, petty theft, inconsiderate, they are just simply BOYS
Bad men: criminals, psychos, fucking scary
When you graduate from bad boys, you don't go to bad men. Bad men will kill you. So dating a bad boy is dating a boy, seeking to relive youth through someone who's terrified to leave it.
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